Roses are red, ballerinas have grace...

Battle Wounds

Talk about hitting the Mark. (Sorry, we had to.)

Meta-formerly-Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg, an avid jiu-jitsu devotee and fighting fan, took to Instagram on Sunday to show off his recent training trophies — which amount to not one, but two, black eyes. And considering that the picture is a close-up selfie that captures just a hint of a smize, it certainly seems like Zucko is pleased to have some battle wounds to flex.

"Sparring got a little out of hand," Zuck captioned the selfie. "May need to update my avatar," he added, presumably in reference to the recently-revamped Metazuck.

Guys Being Dudes

The Facebook founder's sparring scars won the approval of several professional fighters, who took to the post's comment section to commend the billionaire on his bruised appearance.

"Nice shiner!" commented MMA champion Johnny Eblen.

"Earning stripes," added UFC fighter Hyden "The Hurricane" Amil, who included flexed bicep and fire emojis for good measure.

Other commenters took the opportunity to discuss whether two black eyes mean that Zuck is actually a human being after all.

"Proof Mark Zuckerberg isn't a ROBOT," wrote one Instagram user, with another replying: "yes because he is a freaking lizard."

So, regardless of recent improvements to his public relations, it looks like Zuck isn't quite beating those "not human" allegations just yet.

Hobbyist at Large

Since venturing into the world of martial arts and general swoleness last year, Zuck has taken to Meta-owned apps on several occasions to flex his fighting prowess-slash-toned physique. He's also been competing in regional jiu-jitsu tournaments, medaling three times at one such event back in May. (According to some tournament witnesses, Zuck was at one point choked out at that same tournament, although the billionaire has refuted this claim.)

The sword-loving social media pioneer has discussed his passion for fighting at length in recent years, telling podcast and Big Horse Drugs Guy Joe Rogan back in August 2022 that "after an hour or two of working out, or rolling or wrestling with friends, or training with different folks, it's like now I'm ready to go solve whatever problem at work for the day."

We're glad that Zuck's got something to keep his mind clear. And hey, the founder's much-ridiculed metaverse seems to have vastly improved over the past year, so maybe taking some punches — and not just the metaphorical kind — is helping after all.

Still, as pleased with his newfound shiners as the billionaire might be, we're sure that his wife would prefer that he stick to one of his many other hobbies.

More on MMArk: Mark Zuckerberg’s Wife Unhappy He’s Building Fighting Arena in Their Backyard


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