Hair Crimes

Elon Musk Got a Strange Haircut and We Gotta Say, “Yikes”

"Haircut looks like Zorg from 'The Fifth Element.'"
The billionaire was spotted after landing in Miami sporting a hairdo that can only be described as "terminally divorced."
Image: CHANDAN KHANNA/AFP via Getty Images

Welp. It looks like SpaceX founder Elon Musk actually went into a barbershop and said, “Give me the Macklemore haircut.”

On Thursday, the billionaire was spotted after landing in Miami sporting a hairdo that can only be described as “terminally divorced.” Musk was on his way to attend Art Basel Miami, a hoity-toity art fair, with his son in tow, The Daily Mail reports.  

This man literally went into a barbershop and said, "Give me the Macklemore haircut" in this day and age twenty twenty one. pic.twitter.com/tkirrwWCju

— Tony Hồ Trần (@TonyHoWasHere) December 3, 2021

Yeesh.

Social media was quick to jump on the meme fodder, with many instantly roasting the 50-year-old Tesla CEO for getting a haircut that’s a bit out of date even for Gen Z TikTok influencers. 

I should get some sleep because I want to be up early, but I can't stop laughing at Elon Musk and his haircut. pic.twitter.com/bXZNHtqKz9

— doloresquintana (@doloresquintana) December 3, 2021

Musk’s hairdo even spurred comparisons to cartoon characters:

Hey @elonmusk I saw your new haircut, and I just wanted to say. It reminds of someone from my youth, who wasn't the nicest of guys…#villianvibes pic.twitter.com/3CmsQ4vgmM

— Doug, with a mortgage and kids (@TheFlyingDJ2) December 3, 2021

As well as iconic movie characters: 

And even moments in history:

There is a glitch in the Matrix. This guy looks exactly like Elon Musk, especially with his current haircut. pic.twitter.com/InndwO5qHG

— B Graham Disciple (@bgrahamdisciple) April 20, 2021

On a post in the subreddit r/Pics, folks piled on the billionaire, with one user quipping that he “looks like every 14 year old I see getting dropped off at the mall.”

“He’s a Peaky Blinder now,” another user joked.

“He paid good money for those hair implants too,” another added, referencing Musk’s past baldness.

Many made more comparisons to a famous Gary Oldman role, with one user saying, “He looks like Zorg from ‘The Fifth Element.'”

It’s a bold choice for the richest man in the world. You’d think he’d be able to afford a haircut that’s more, um, flattering. As with all bad haircuts, though, it’ll grow out, Elon. Don’t worry. 

Unless, of course, it is just a hairpiece. If that’s the case, he might want to swap it out from something that’s a bit less Big Mid-Life Crisis Energy.

More on Elon: A Day Before the Bankruptcy Leak, Musk Quietly Hinted at Taking SpaceX Public

Tony Tran is a reporter for Futurism. His work has been seen in Playboy, HuffPost, Narratively, and wherever else fine writing is published. He lives in Chicago where he frequently plans tabletop gaming sessions for his friends. Follow him on Twitter.