Orlando... don't....

The Merchant of Venice

Pop star and space tourist Katy Perry and actor Orlando Bloom have reportedly split after nearly a decade together — and he's apparently planning to use the spectacle of the century to let his single flag fly.

Many of the world's elites have descended upon Venice, Italy this week to partake in the nuptial bonanza that is the marriage between billionaire Amazon founder Jeff Bezos and television-journalist-slash-aviation-specialist Lauren Sánchez. The event — which has reportedly been moved to a more isolated location amid Venetian protests — is to take place over three days of action-packed festivities, and yes, it's very, very expensive.

But Perry reportedly isn't planning to attend the wedding. By all public accounts, she counts Sánchez as a close friend: she attended Sánchez's pricey bachelorette party in Paris, and the pair infamously embarked together on a much-derided trip to space onboard one of Bezos' Blue Origin rockets. But the wedding is said to conflict with her ongoing world tour, and thus, Perry is abstaining from the fun.

Bloom, meanwhile, is still planning to attend. And according to TMZ, as a newly-minted single man, he's planning to hit the weekend — and the dance floor — "hard."

"He's the life of the party," a source told TMZ, "and he's gonna hit the dance floor hard!" Orlando, please... the people of Venice are going through enough as it is.

Elven Rizz

Perry is rumored to be annoyed that Bloom is still planning to attend the nuptials following their alleged split, which was reportedly influenced by the stress of her poorly-received "143" album and the widespread ridicule directed at her "ass in astronaut" mission to space.

"Katy feels like they're really her friends more than his, and yet he's the one going to the wedding," one source told the Daily Mail. "And he's insistent that he goes, which annoys her because he's not particular [sic] close to either of them. She feels like it’s a 'f*ck you' to her from him."

"He complains about her going to space, and then wants to go to the wedding of the people who made it possible for her to do this in the first place," the source continued. "That's difficult for her to accept."

If true: fair! It's pretty tough to imagine being angry at your partner for going to space, before then heading to Italy to celebrate the Space Baron and Baroness' knot-tying. At the very least, Bloom should be contractually obligated to smooch the Italian soil upon touching down.

More on the Bezos-Sánchez wedding: Jeff Bezos' Wedding Was Reportedly Pushed Back Due to Prenup Issues


Share This Article