What in tarnation?

Smoking Gun

A resplendent green comet is streaking across the night sky — but not for much longer. C/2022 E3, or ZTF, as it's called, will only be in view for a few more days before vanishing into the distant cosmos for around 50,000 years.

Not everyone is convinced that ZTF is just a gassy bit of space ice, though. Have a look at this insane email sent to Timothy Schmidt, a professor of chemistry at the University of New South Wales, that proposes the comet is actually some sort of cursed biological meatball. And you thought flat Earthers were nuts.

"Comets are not dusty snowballs as you clearly see in [the] Comet 67P study where [the European Space Agency] landed and sampled… it is 100 percent organic…" the email reads, which Schmidt shared in a tweet. "The gasing off is meat smoke that did not combust [and] simply vaporizes in sunlight… that's why they shot out at different angles. Metals [are] from the blood vessels and the big one is from the artery."

"I have ones here that have LOTS OF BLOOD and are iron meteorites," they claimed. "Can we discuss this?"

Meathead Theory

Poor professor Schmidt was at a loss for words.

"I think this is the craziest email I have ever received, which says a lot," he wrote.

"Honestly, this is beautiful," another chemistry professor tweeted in response to Schmidt. "ChatGPT could never hallucinate such an original message. This email is pure, terrifying humanity."

From what Schmidst can tell, the sender appears to be a man who runs a YouTube channel with over 170,000 subscribers, where you can "learn about the true nature" of space rocks that are actually — yes — "mudfossils" which contain flesh and blood body parts. Huh.

In the YouTuber's latest video on the green comet, he opines this whole academic consensus thing on meteorites is a giant sham.

"You know what's stunning is the incompetence of our scientists in academia!" he scolded. "They're destroying the minds of all the people. They are the destroyers of the human mind."

More on the green comet: Behold! Dazzling Green Comet Approaches

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