Watch 40 Ravenous Goats Terrorize an Unsuspecting Suburb

"One of the guys on two legs was just eating my tree. It was pretty wild."

Bleating Pillagers

Hide your kids, hide your wife.

Footage shared by Dallas-based news station WFAA shows residents of a sleepy Dallas suburb waking up to an unexpected herd of roughly 40 goats wandering through their development, munching on lawns and landscaping as they went.

"We woke up and I said, 'You won't fucking believe what happened on the Cove this morning,'" local resident Garrett Piersall told WFAA.

"I think they ate a little bit from everybody's yard all the way around the circle here," he continued. "One of the guys on two legs was just eating my tree. It was pretty wild."

 

Totes McGoats

As videos captured by multiple security cameras show, the goats were extremely docile — just a little peckish. Who hasn't been there?

"They were coming down the road really slowly," added Mike Danielson, another resident of the goated development, "and kinda chilled out right here."

The goats were initially tasked with eating down vegetation, helping the development during fire season. But they ended up over a mile off-course.

Piersall wasn't too dismayed. In fact, the goats did him a favor when it came to some bushes on his property.

"It actually did us a favor because we were probably going to pull them this week or next anyway," he told WFAA.

At the end of the day, we're very happy that the loose goats have been returned to their flock, and that everyone's landscaping has since been restored. And judging from interviews with the residents, it seems like neighborhood inhabitants mostly just got a good laugh out of the ordeal.

We simply must stan these hungry escapees — may they bless another unsuspecting Texas development again soon.

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